F1 2010

F1 2010
Codemasters

XBox360
PS3
PC Download







Ok petrol heads so here I am, stuck in the Dungeon of Reaper Towers left alone with the new F1 game, so does it live up to the hype? The short answer is O hell ya it does… and then some! F1 2010 has been brought to us by Codemasters, who also brought us TOCA - Grid and Dirt series, so you would bet your left nut that F1 2010 is going to be good and you would be right... great news for your left nut, eh! So let’s empty the bladders, zip up the fireproof suit, and get your ass comfy in the chair… let’s Go! Go! Go!


Each of the nineteen grand prix circuits have been designed perfectly even the Korean Grand Prix is here complete with grand stands. When you come out of your garage and onto the pit lane, you get a real sense of apprehension as you hear the cars going down the track beside you. With three different career paths to choose from ranging from three, five and seven seasons in length. The career you select will determine the different experiences you are offered. Pick a seven season career and you start off in a Lotus, Virgin Racing, or Hispania Racing where you get an opportunity to work your way up the grid. Then there is a three season career where you’re offered to drive with BMW, Williams, Force India or Turo Rosso and the like. But to access the top dogs you have to prove your worthiness of getting a seat in Ferrari, McLaren, Mercedes, Renault or Red Bull. Alternatively you can jump straight in to the quick race, custom race or time trials, plus there’s the multiplayer mode, plenty of options for the hardcore to the casual race head alike. That’s the real beauty of this game! Just by adjusting a few options it goes from a easy ride for the casual gamer who just wants to blast around a track into a full on simulator for the hardcore enthusiast. Mostly though, this will appeal to the formula one nut’s with all the set up options and fine tweaking that can be done to get that tenth of a second you need for pole position.

The racing itself in the single player is very close to reality and mimics what you see on TV with only a couple of seconds between cars. The cars themselves have a real sense of weight with massive turn in and exiting speeds which just keep pushing you to find that sweet spot. Choose the wrong set up for a track or go too soon on the accelerator and you will be doing donuts all day. Don’t worry if you’re not into locking wheels and burning out back tyres, you can turn on the ABS and traction control in the options setting which does make the cars much easier to drive but doesn’t remove any of the high speed enjoyment.


The race weekends can be customised to your liking with either short or long weekends. This will determine how many practice and qualifying session there are. During the weekend you get challenges, one of which is – beat your teammate. Completing these challenges unlocks new R&D parts that can be used for upgrades and you can work your way into the number one spot on the team… race heads know how important that is! Completing objectives and scoring points also brings you to the attention of teams higher up the grid who will all want you to drive for them… if you’re good enough!

The flag and penalty system tends to lean on the heavy side, a slight tap that in real life would potentially end up in a tangled mess of metal and bone but in the game it could result in a ten second time penalty instead, a bit unrealistic to say the least. At no stage in the game can you drive through cars, except in the pit stop… coming into the pits other cars just ghost drive right through you and into their pitbox, this breaks the illusion of realism successfully and it sucks. Added to this that your lollipop man won’t release you until they’re gone and you have one huge WTF!!! When tight on time or points, this is really, really annoying! That aside the pitstops are as you see on the TV in fact the only thing that’s missing is Ted Kravitz giving a running commentary.


During the various single player modes you have to deal with the press. Slag off the team or act like an obnoxious dick and it goes down like a fart in a space suit. Answer it like a champion and the team will love you! Yay! Your agent will be sitting in the motor home keeping an eye over the whole picture and don’t worry she will let you know how you’re progressing and what the team thinks of you!


Familiar tracks such as ‘Circuit de Catalunya’ (Spain), ‘Silverstone Racing Circuit’ (England) and ‘Suzuka Circuit’ (Japan) may make an appearance in other games like Forza 3 or Grand Turismo but they do not feel the same as they do in F1 2010. If you think you know what to expect from playing tracks in other games then you’re in for a fright. Everything here is different, the bumps, cambers, curb height and general handling around these tracks are greatly different and far more realistic. The best way to approach a circuit that you think you know is to forget everything - cornering speeds, grip levels, everything! Because they are all different here, they are faster, stickier, and bumpier so be prepared for a very real experience.

Multiplayer consists of four different game modes ‘Pole Position’ which is a twenty minute qualifying session where the winner is the player with the fastest time. ‘Sprint’, this is a single three lap race with random cars and grid slots. An ‘Endurance race’ consisting of a twenty percent race length track with dynamic weather, random grid slot and one pit stop, and lastly the ‘Online Grand Prix’ complete with a fifteen minute qualifying session and a seven lap race with dynamic weather and a pit stop. A mode to suit all moods and an enjoyable experience when shared with other serious racers.

The graphics on this game are very good with the detail that has gone into each car short of amazing. It is evident that the development team really benefited from having technical assistance from a current F1 driver and it seems the information he was able to provide has really come though adding to all aspects of this game. The “dynamic” weather system is one of the best weather systems in any racing game to date. Coming out of the La Source hairpin and up Eau Rouge with the rain pissing down is truly breath taking, you cannot see where you are going because there is water streaming off your screen and the car in front has disappeared into a cloud of mist, and you know there is a corner coming, but where? Just like the real thing! The audio is realistic, perhaps a bit too real… take my advice on this - go into the settings and turn the engine noise down! Your ears will thank you for it! Although each car has its own sound, after a while it just bores into your head and this being the dominant sound for most of the game, it just might drive you mad!

Granted the customization option or car selection do not have the same easy appeal as Forza or Gran Turismo but then again you wouldn't by Fifa and bitch about not being able to play as the NY Jets would you? Comparing this game to any other would be like comparing Doom to Modern Warfare – yes, they are both FPS games but they don’t share the same level of involvement. That said, Codemasters have omitted a few things that would have been nice to see and many race heads would perhaps expect in a formula one race - no formation lap before you start the race, no nutter running on the track with his ballsack flying in the wind and no safety car! I suppose they have to keep something in the bag for upcoming patches / F1 2011.There are also many bugs with the most serious being a corruption to save files which the developer is aware of and is addressing. There are also other small issues scattered throughout the game but future patches are promised and the problems should be corrected in time.

F1 2011 is not perfect and is really just for the F1/Petrol head fans. Casual race fans may find it fun initially but could soon be put off by the range and complexity of technical options. That said it is a high quality racer for the eyes and for the thumbs, personally I love it! True, I am a confessed petrol head and love nothing better than a hi octane experience, throw in a few pedestrians or even zombies and it would be nirvana… but as it stands the only thing better than watching the Grand Prix on TV is being in it and this is the closest many of us will ever get. Pound for pound this is the best racing game out there.

Buy it, love it, smell the rubber!!!

SpiderMan: Shattered Dimensions

SpiderMan:
Shattered Dimensions
Marvel/Activision/Beenox

Xbox 360
PS3
PC
Wii
PSP

Ok web slingers here we go with the latest instalment from the folks at Marvel and Activision/Beenox. That’s right, one of comics most exploited characters is back on our screens in this little dimension hopping adventure. So let’s put on the tight latex suit and standard face coverings so we can swing right into it... No, not the Gimp suit! The Spidy suit, all four of em!


Spidy has made a balls of things by mistakenly creating four dimensions, this accident sets off your quadrupole adventure of webbed mayhem. The objective of the game is to search through the four new dimensions and find pieces of a mystic tablet to save reality before it all goes pop, right so no pressure then Spidy! Cross dressing has never been so heroic, you will get to be the Classic Neighborhood Spidy that we all know and love/hate so well, the 'Noir' Spidy of a by gone age who is a bit of a bad ass. There is Ultimate Spidy in his cool black S&M looking spandex and the least popular, Spidy 2099 who is a arrogant cock! All have their own dimension and surroundings to fit their persona's and all in all its an interesting concept. During these various themed levels you will face a heap of spider-mans favorite bosses along the way, which is cool. Throw in the obligatory hidden spiders and collectibles scattered about, and you more or less have a typical spider-man game but be warned, this is not the Spidy game you are used to playing not by a long webbed shot. That’s right, feel the Spidy senses tingling, anyone hoping for a nice big city that's free to run around in is going to be really, really, disappointed! It’s A to B stuff, the sandbox format is gone in the bin. Booooo!! But that doesn't mean its a crap game... or does it?


Game play is fast, you’re thrown into the action straight away, from the moment you start the level you are corralled down a linear path, there is nowhere to go but forward. You meet and chase Spidy's first Nemesis 'Kraven the Hunter' through out the level, eventually ending up in a jungle based thunder dome arena. This begins the first boss battle of the game. After wearing down Kraven's health something new and interesting happens, you go into a first person view for a punch up during the last moment of the final fight. You move the left and right analogue sticks for punching and dodging, a bit like EA's boxing games of late. This was a really nice surprise that is very well executed and is a pretty fresh feature to this type of game and probably one of the games better qualities. That said, all boss battles follow this format, they are rinse and repeat affairs - find the weak spot, hit it, hide, hit it again etc... Next!!


The general formula is also the same all the way through each level, beat up the weak bad guys, beat up the strong bad guys, beat up the stronger bad guys, fight the boss, rescue the civilians, then beat up all the bad guys again, then beat the boss... Again! Arg!
Initially this is fun for each level but eventually it looses its excitement and becomes a routine affair.
The controls in general are straight forward enough, but the overloading on some buttons can cause a bit of finger frustration. The targeting system isn't great and causes issues when trying to quick zip to surfaces but you end up swinging into the enemies target area instead, its just poorly done. What was wrong with the old system Spidy... WHAT!!??

The level design is boring and lazy, the designers need to hung upside down in shame and covered in web-goo I recon, how could they come up with this when they had four strong individual characters and four different versions of New York to play with, all with four different time periods to pour over it all? Tut, tut! Not to mention some past Spidy games as inspiration that were of a high quality. It's a missed opportunity to improve on previous games rather than to reboot it poorly but I guess that was a gamble they were willing to risk... unfortunately!

Visually its not bad, graphics are not ground breaking by any stretch of the imagination but having the four different dimensions with their own “unique style” was a nice touch and a solid idea. However its all a bit overwhelming on the orbs, mixing bright colours in one dimension with cell shading for another then to the dark and dirty style of the next, it’s a bit of a messed up mind fuck. Although it is trying to give contrast between levels it just makes it visually inconsistent and confusing. I felt that it falls short of what the developers were trying to achieve.

The audio just meanders along like some depressed worker looking forward to a day in the mines, it does what it does just enough to get by. Ok, so Spider man himself has been voiced by 4 different actors giving Spidy a “unique” quality each time and our favourite web head has also been armed with all the smart answers you would come to expect but after a while it just blends into monotony and repetition. The only really cool thing is having Stan “The Man” Lee as narrator but even then you’re looking for the skip button.


This game is a fun filler at best, after you complete the game it will sit on the shelf never to be touched again. That’s of course if you could be arsed to even finish it. Personally I like to finish every game I start, but even this is going to push me to my limits, and trust me I have played some doozers in my time... 'Spider-man Shattered dimensions' is a level based platformer that unfortunately offers very little new to the genre. The early novelties soon run out of steam and you just start ploughing through it, perhaps real Spidy heads will enjoy it just because of its brand but not for its merits as a game. I can tell you this, if I had spent my hard earned cash on it, I‘d be very pissed off.


Rent it, play it, forget it.

Dead Rising 2: Case Zero Review

Dead Rising 2: Case Zero DLC
Xbox 360
Capcom

Case Zero is the prequel to the upcoming zombie smasher ‘Dead Rising 2’ from our crazy friends in Capcom. In this DLC you get to take control of Chuck Greene, a man with a past in motor cross who has a big dilemma. His Daughter Kathy has been bitten by a dead meat sack while escaping Las Vegas, to make things worse Chuck decides to stop for a pee or whatever in a little shitville town gas station. Things soon go tits up when the truck with all the precious, pricy ‘zombrex’, a drug that holds off the zombie infection, gets stolen and he gets stranded in this small town of ‘Still Creek’. Here’s where the fun starts, commence Zombie dismemberment!
The overall objective of the game is to build a motorbike so you and your daughter can ride off into the sunset before the military arrive to cleanse the town. This involves searching around for bike parts, fighting your way through hordes of the undead, meeting some helpless survivors and of course a run in with the local fucked up, shit crazy redneck boss. During all this you will have the opportunity to see the new physics and weapon combos in action, along with much improved survivor AI...Thank Christ!! Because the last lot were as dumb as a bunch of retarded rocks!

The clock is always ticking in case zero, the timelines given to get things sorted are tight and like the original are quite punishing if you make a mess of things and leave yourself short of time, frustrating is one way to describe this and ‘Aww Fuck It!’ is another. You will also notice a big difference in the overall feel of the controls, it is much improved over ‘Dead Rising’ and far less annoying.
There is also plenty of zombie killing antics to keep you happy with a wide variety of weapons that help you paint the town red, literally. Take a chainsaw, take another chainsaw, get a paddle, and what have you got? Canoeing… Jason Voorhees style! Chuck also gets to use shotguns, machine guns, broadswords, moose heads, handbags, etc. Nearly anything that’s not nailed down can be used as a weapon to chop, crush, blind, skew, run over or splat the drooling meat heads and this is where the true fun and guts of the game lie.

Following on in the blood splattered footsteps of the original ‘Dead Rising’ there are the silly costumes for you to change into, although smashing heads in the maids dress is just wrong, it’s funny and sickly pleasing… but wrong! The blender makes a welcome return and allows you to mix all sorts of food types together for those special smoothes that keep you alive or boost your abilities. For the Alco’s among us you can mix the booze together, one bottle of bourbon not enough, hell mix two. But remember drinking too much alcohol will make you sick… but the zombies do love a pile of puke to lick or slip on... yum! The level up books also make a reappearance but only some of the abilities you learn from them are permanent while others last for a short time. The whole experience is all very familiar, yet all quite new in a strange way.

Yes there are a few flaws in the game, loading times, graphics glitches and the lack of audible speech when dealing with survivors... all of which I’m hoping will be addressed in the full game, because if the loading times are that bad in ‘Dead Rising 2’ that will really suck zombie balls. Having said that, this is just a ‘demo’, all be it for 400msp, it’s a great mini game at that price and the ability to carry across your character points from ‘case zero’ into the main game is cool… up to a max of level 5, which will no doubt come in handy for Chucks next adventure.

At the end of the day this game is designed to give you a taste of the blood and guts that waits on a much grander scale and to basically get you started on the zombie paved road to Vegas, and boy does it deliver with every squishy footstep. It is a riot from start to finish, and I found myself playing it again and again. So if you’re a Zombie fan, flash the cash and get it! Trust me - there’s some serious blood and guts fun to be had with a bucket load of zombie bashing in ‘Dead Rising 2: Case Zero’.

Buy it, Play it, Love it!

Splinter Cell Conviction - Demo Impressions. Worth the Hype?

Splinter Cell - Conviction Demo

Xbox 360







Well, Tom Clancy’s Splinter Cell Conviction is released on the 16th of April (2010) which is only a few weeks away and the demo has been available for free on Xbox live for awhile and as always my first comment is this… play the god-dammed game demo for yourself, it’s the best way to Judge a game! If your too lazy or don’t have access to the demo then this one’s for you.

The newest Splinter Cell: Conviction is the fifth tale (not including the PSP title ‘Essentials’) of Sam Fisher and possibly the last I suspect… If you are expecting more of the same old hide, tippy toe, grab, kill, hide body, fade away or get killed - style of play then you’re in for a disappointment… or treat depending on your perspective.

The story seems to be a reasonably a good one, Sam’s daughter was killed by a drunk driver while he was away in ‘Chaos Theory’ but he now knows that it was set up by his former employers ‘Third Echelon’ and our hero is here to kick ass and chew bubble gum… and he’s all out of gum. This tale of revenge has Sam as a ronin outlaw on the edge and looking to kill the actual person who gave the nod for his daughters ‘accident’ for some much deserved testicular detachment. I suspect there will be twists and turns that will involve past characters along the way and a soap opera style reveal at the end but all that is to be discovered in the full game.



Visually the game looks good, I cannot say it is amazing or anything ground breaking but it is definitely of a high standard, animations are fluid and convincing and the sounds are weighty, giving atmosphere to the environments. Overall the production value is high but you would expect as much from the Ubisoft stable and a long running franchise such as this.

There are new game mechanics at work that favour combat over the stealth approach. When spotted by enemies Sam is now much faster to escape, takes less damage from attacks and is far more skillful at shooting on the fly. This for some gamers is a welcome change from the previous games where if you were spotted by a trigger happy terrorist you cold kiss your ass goodbye if you failed to escape quickly enough. It does however make the stealth approach optional with combat the easier option, which many Splinter Cell fans would say undermines the whole purpose of this franchise and will have its granddaddy titles like ‘Thief’ rolling in its grave. Others might welcome this new and fresh approach and feel it is needed to breathe life into a dying format.

The various vision modes and the usual gadgets are all still there and are much easier to access through a new selection system. The demo was not very informative in regard to the range of gadgets available (I imagine there will be new ones in the full game) but it would seem that you don’t need them at all as I got through the whole thing during a single play through without having to use even one optional item, only the mission crucial ones, which to be honest was a bit disappointing as it would have been a richer experience if tactics were needed to succeed. Weapons cannot be judged by the demo as only a limited supply are available but you can now poach ones dropped by fallen enemies which is pretty cool.



There are two new additions worthy of note, first is the ‘ghosting’ system which shows a transparent form of Sam in the environment, this represents where the enemy believes you to have been last, giving Sam the chance to either leave the bad man in a decoy area and sneak past, or to open a can of whoop-ass on the unsuspecting enemy. This is a pretty cool feature, though apart from the visual indicator it is not exactly revolutionary in Splinter Cell games as this is pretty much what players used their diversion gadgets for in the past. The other notable addition and change to the play style is a sort of auto targeting system for shooting grouped enemies. Accomplishing ‘stealth kills’ will build up an ‘adrenalin bar’, when this is full you are then able to mark two (possibly more in the full game?) targets from a position of cover and then press shoot, Sam will then follow a pre-determined animation of taking down the two baddies in one quick attack. This does keep the pace of the game moving but it takes the skill and chance of failure out of the player’s hands and it all feels a bit automated.



Mission briefings are replaced by text on surfaces that instruct you on what to do or where to go next and are a clever idea and keeps the pace flowing as there is no need for a menu or cut scene so overall it is a plus.. I guess. The ‘AI’ does not seem to be too high, dummies… I mean, enemies are easily led to their death and even when in open combat they seem slow to react and generally sluggish only posing a real danger when in groups of three and more. Even on a higher skill level they seemed a bit retarded but their bullets just did more damage. Listening to their prattle talk can be fun and getting a poor bastard in a choke grip and using him as a human shield is satisfying though not a new feature. What is strange though is you no longer can carry and hide an incapacitated victim… which is a real shame.



Environments have sufficient hiding and grappling areas which were enjoyable to tackle with only the odd frustration of falling or missing a ledge to grab when being chased. There are lots of dark areas to hide and lights to shoot or turn off adding to the strategic plan if you do decide to play that way. Though quite well designed your path through the level is pretty obvious, perhaps a little too much so and overall a bitlinier. In saying that, it is only a starting or instructional level so I imagine the full game maps will be of a improved standard.

There will also be a multiplayer aspect bundled in, this promises some good co-op play and online competitive action. If previous attempts of Splinter Cell multiplayer games are anything to go on then that could well be this titles strongest and most enjoyable aspect… but we shall have to wait and see.


It would not be the first time that a demo can give a misleading impression to gamers. I am hoping that this is one of those times because I cannot say this is quite the title that I was personally expecting, although I’m sure it will be enjoyable enough. For gamers that have played all of the Splinter Cell games and indeed other Tom Clancy tactical shooters such as Ghost Recon and Rainbow Six, they might well fell that ‘Conviction’ is all a bit ‘arcade’ like or ‘dumbed down’. People new to splinter cell and more casual players might enjoy this new approach more so and gladly leave behind getting caught up in finer details or punishing scenarios found in previous versions of Splinter Cell. There seems to be an easy learning curve and less of a challenge compared to its predecessors and less in the way of skilled strategic shooter elements, resulting in more fluid progression with more automated scenarios… so depending on your perspective, this is either very good or very bad.

Personally I will miss the strategic elements, although I do feel that the Splinter Cell IP did need an overhaul to make it fresh, this is not the approach I would have hoped for… (Queue the rotten fruit and veg throwing). There are lots of shooters on the market, and if that’s what I want then it’s easy to get my grubby gaming hands on one… finding a good sneak em up is a much more difficult task. An unpopular opinion I imagine given the hype and anticipation surrounding this title but an honest one all the same. I imagine that the success, true strength and perhaps the saving grace of Splinter Cell Conviction, for most gamers, will be the depth of the story and atmosphere, which appears to be simple but solid. Perhaps it will be enough to fill in the cracks for any other short comings it may have. Hopefully the demo is only a narrow view into what I hope will be a great gaming experience… Gadgets crossed eh!

Dantes Inferno - The Review.

Dantes Inferno EA, Visceral Games, Xbox 360, PS3, PC










There has been a bolloc load of hype around this hack n slasher prior to release and a bit of a hate campaign after, so with all the marketing and media surrounding this title it is fair to say that the essential truth about Dante’s inferno has been lost in the mix and that is – Does it suck like a 20 stone midget on a milkshake or is it the angelic blood fest we want it to be?
After playing the demo I was not impressed and felt very let down as I really wanted to like this game. The idea of taking the works of Dante Alighieri’s Divine Comedy from the 14th century and bringing it into the twenty first century as the basis for a game - to me is absolute genius! Keep in mind that EA and Visceral games are not trying to rewrite this classic poem, it is only the premise for a great romp through Hell itself and a pretty smart marketing angle too. Hopefully other publishers will adopt this type of concept and tie it into their games as some have in the past (Bioshock - influenced by Atlas Shrugged from author Ayn Rand), it can potentially add a great deal of weight and depth if done well.
By now we all know the premise of Dante’s Inferno as far as the game is concerned… Dante is one serious bad ass doing God’s work by butchering Muslims during the Crusades. Turns out that was a crock of shit and all he has been really doing is racking up hell points for himself, Duh! Making a long story short Dante finds out that his hot blond bird ‘Beatrice’ has been killed and is promised to Hell because of his sins. Dante of course follows her into Hell with some divine help from a holy ghost by the name of ‘Virgil’. At this point you have to start a journey through the nine circles of the underworld and the fun begins!



So let’s get on the highway to hell and see just how hot this game is or is not. First off, the game looks great. Visuals are rich and colourful giving a good fell of being in various areas of Hell. Attention to detail is very strong and there always seems to be something going on in the background. Levels like ‘Gluttony’ are suitably gooey, snotty and gross while the likes of ‘Lust’ are suitably raunchy in a sick way… it’s all sexy dangly bits everywhere, more old age pensioner than playboy mansion though. Each of the areas through hell are suitably customised and well designed in relation to their theme while the moaning and groaning of lost souls echoes through the background screams. The atmosphere is well executed in sight and sound and at times is almost a bit pee you’re your pants freaky. Animations and models are also of a high standard, the whole 60fps trick that Visceral Games have used seems to have worked well. There is a reasonable variety of enemies to bash and the list grows as you go through each circle of Hell but quite often you will face the same demon drones, with the special level types popping in for a kicking every now and then. Combat is pretty basic… You have Deaths scythe and the holy crucifix to combat enemies, the scythe extracts evil points in the form of souls and the cross good points. These souls unlock skills which come in the form of extra health, stronger attacks, and combo moves. You will also meet dammed famous figures of history and myths that require your judgement, condemn or absolve, the choice is yours, but these decisions will influence your dark or light power points. Collectibles come in the form of Relics and Judas coins, these also add to your pool of souls while the relics can be equipped and upgraded giving an array of benefits. All of this will help you get access to evil abilities or good ones, you can spread them out over both disciplines, but it really has little impact on the overall game as to which side you invest in. Executing new moves is as easy as pulling the legs of a beellez-bug and requires little in the way of complex brain to finger function. You can mix it up by trying out the various options of combos but you really don’t need to, basic chopping or shooting crucifixes will do the trick with the odd need to shield or dodge. You could say this is too basic and simple or you could look at it that it doest get in the way of fluid progression. Either way slicing off demon heads or hacking at a bunch of evil babies is still a fun experience. This can become a bit repetitive but it never really gets boring and if you do decide to try and learn the combos then it will keep it even fresher. In Hell size matters, bosses are massive and impressive to look at but lack little in the way of a punch for the most part. Beating the hell spawn upper elite is pretty easy and usually involves a basic ‘rinse and repeat’ method, but again it is enjoyable rather that annoying. You will even have some objectives that involve controlling giant demons like a vehicle and these, although a bit token, are enjoyable and change the pace giving a break from the button bashing. Eventually you will confront the devil himself, who is actually quite a cool dude despite his need to show off the twig and giggleberries on a regular basis, well it is hot down there I guess. Then there’s the sexy Beatrice who is almost always naked, being fondled by bad men and giving Dante a constant guilt trip… ungrateful cow! Minos will try and crush ya, Cleopatra will try and screw ya, Mark Anthony will try and poke ya, Gluttons will try and eat ya, and the rest will just try and kill ya in colourful ways. It’s fair to say that Dante is having a pretty shit day! The holy freak Virgil will guide you on your way through all this giving his down beat advice and generally being a misery. Thanks for nothing ya ectoplasmic freak in a dress!

Overall it’s fair to say that Dante’s Inferno is nice on the eyes and enjoyable to play while simple to get through even on the top difficulty setting but what makes this stand out from the crowd just that little bit is its story and theme. The game is a bit short and easy to rip through and holds little in the way of a challenge but it does this wrapped up in beautiful visuals and fluid fun button bashing that has a story compelling enough for you to want to know what comes next. The in-between cut scenes are top quality and really enrich the atmosphere of it all. That said it feels like there could have been more added to the game, especially in terms of game length and enemy variety but perhaps I’m just being greedy… It does have a flavour that many of the early PS2 ‘hack n’ slash’ games did and feels quite nostalgic, at least to old fogies like me. And yes, this is basically God of War but that’s not such a bad thing especially for PC and Xbox owners.

If you like button bashers, demons, game nudity, buckets of bloody gore, biblical overtones and hero saves the day kinda stuff then you will thoroughly enjoy this romp through Hell, it’s just good old fun with lots of boobies, some bigger than a truck… honest! If you’re looking for innovate, high brow style game play, then leave Dante in Hell. What you really want to know is should you Buy, Rent, or Pass? Well there is some DLC coming for this soon so that will add multiplayer, that could influence your decision but if ya couldn't give a demon’s dick about such things then renting is probably a good idea. Chances are you will play through this once, maybe twice but then it’s gonna become a dust collector or trade in for most people. I really enjoyed Dante’s Inferno so if that’s a sin then send me to Hell, I have to say I am looking forward to the sequels which I imagine will be ‘Dante’s Purgatory’ then ‘Dante’s Paradise’, this would complete the Divine Comedy (Look it up you lazy people) but of course with a Visceral Games twist added. That said one man’s Heaven is another man’s Hell… I really enjoyed this but it’s really a matter of taste, if ya don’t like it spit it out but it’s worth chewing!

Dante's Inferno Demo Impressions - Hot or Not?

Dante's Inferno - Demo Impressions.
Xbox 360
PS3
PC

EA, Visceral Games.









Well, the Dante's Inferno free demo was released on the PS3 and Xbox 360 just before Christmas and is now available to all. If you haven't got your dirty lil hands on it yet I suggest you do and see what you make of it for yourself. Our opinion's on the demo here at Reaper Towers are quite split... Mr Exciting Alien hated it, he thought the 2D cut scenes were nothing short of amateur and the game play is repetitive and boring old hack n' slash button bashing that gave no satisfaction... ooo harsh!! But he has a point. Although I don't think Dante's Inferno is quite that bad, I was very disappointed, I really thought this ticked all the boxes for a top end experience and given all the great Dev Diary's we have seen and shared over the past months I was expecting more... As we tear the soul from this demo do keep in mind that it is just a demo and the kind of game a player will love or hate depending on a gamers taste of game type, so do the best review possible before you decide... play it for yourself! In the meantime here's my two cents...

The environments are rich and well executed with visuals in general very pleasing. The characters and animations are also very good with a nice variety of hell spawn enemies to chop up. Unfortunately, the camera can be a pain in the ass and swings wildly at times, which is frustrating during battles. Controls are over complicated (but this can be said for most hack and slash games) which means you rely on the basic attacks for the most part and accidentally end up doing combos. Cut scene timed button bashing is here in mass, the game is overdosed with this feature and is just overdone... it is OK here and there but when its all the time it becomes repetitive and annoying. Combat is fast paced but again becomes a button masher with little in the sense of satisfying attacks, it all just feels weightless.
You have a sort of path choice to make which is cool, you can save your enemies souls as you dismember their bodies through the power of good in the form of a divine crucifix which gives you good brownie points or chop em up with Deaths scythe and this will give you nasty points, basically its like force power but without bath robes and beards. As you fill up on good and evil souls you are allowed to level up abilities, personally I thought this menu setup looked and functioned awkwardly and could potentially become annoying at later stages, but it does open up some useful powers and there is a good sense that Dante is getting more powerful with each advancement.
There seems to be a good atmosphere and story to the game which may be its strongest feature, that said it is far from perfect... A point in case is where you have a chat with 'Death' himself during battle and he comes across as a moany little bitch when ya start kicking his ass... it just felt... immature or silly. On the up side there is a part of the demo where you control a giant demon allowing you to bite off enemy heads and relive your Godzilla fetish for a few moment, mmm yummy! The overall experience is middle of the road with a few high points, it is not a bad game but it is no God Of War either, unfortunately! As it stands, if you love hack n' slash games then play it through and trade it in when it gets boring, if you are not a big fan of this type of game I don't think there is much here to change your opinion...

I think that Dante's Inferno has the potential to be a Good game... not a Great one as originally hoped. If EA and Visceral Games start spending as much time and effort cleaning up the games shortcomings as they have spent on their hype machine then we could have a real kick ass experience here... but at the moment it is a title destined to purgatory I fear... I know its only a demo but the omens are not good, sort it out dev dudes, make Hell a nice place to be!!!

Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2 – Story Mode - Early Impressions

Call Of Duty: Modern Warfare 2

Xbox 360
PS3
PC





Ok, the truth is this game doesn’t need a review it’s going to sell like hot cakes at a fatty convention regardless… Already it has sold around five million copies and is only out a few days. So the short review is ’It’s great, get it!’. This is exactly what we all did I recon but for the odd one of you out there still on the fence, here is a our early impression on playing through the story mode…

Visually this game is as beautiful as its predecessor and then-some, it puts all other current FPS games recently released to shame and shows how the life span of the current generation of gaming machines should stay as is, while the game development improves instead. Infinity ward have tried their best to immerse you into the story and have done a fine job. There are many locations to play in and every one of them feels like a scene from a movie or TV show. Production values in general are top of the line, great sound and a talented celebrity list of voice actors drops you even deeper into the pit of war.

The weapons are very realistic and have great weight and feel. Like a NRA meeting at Charlton Heston’s house it seems that everywhere you go there are guns and weapons lying around, and with a wide variety to choose from its difficult to stick with just one type. There is also the big weapons you access at certain point in the game, like the predator drone that you can control fully, it rains a fiery death on mass groups of evil anti western baddies and there’s the numerous fixed gun placements for maximum carnage and the list goes on, each one bringing a nice ‘Holy Shit – that’s cool!’ type of feeling.

The NPC’s in the game are convincing and even humorous at times and you really feel like just another grunt in the big battles and fight alongside your band of brothers as opposed to the lone ranger style of play. Some situations are truly breath taking, don’t worry, no spoilers, but when you’re fighting in a parking lot of fast food joints as baddies drop from the sky and you then have to secure a rooftop while surrounded by enemies, you will see what I mean. Later missions like the snow base combine stealth and vehicle action so perfectly it feels like a bond movie and then there’s the controversial ‘Terrorist’ mission… This you can choose to skip playing but let’s be honest, everyone is going to try it, when you do it is down to your own judgement how to participate and I personally found it all a bit boring after I capped a few civilians, bit like shooting fish in a barrel, so I then began shooting up the shops instead which was a bit more fun. Yeah, sure, the idea of killing innocent people in an airport has shock value and is shocking for the first few seconds but like I have said already, everything in this game is like a scene out of a movie or TV show, it’s not that different to a bank robbery sequence or an episode of ‘24’. Ultimately I can see why it is in the game as it is a primary plot factor to the chaos that follows, it really grabs you by the balls and pulls you into the story… and remember it is a game not reality, an adult rated 18’s title, not for kiddies and the truth of it is that the concept is far more sinister sounding than the actual playing, critics should keep that in mind.
Now with that little rant out of the way I can tell you that the level is not all about putting holes into innocent people, there are cops and Riot teams to tackle and this up’s the excitement and challenge. There are many world locations from a place in the sun to the depths of the sea, blinding storms to the vacuum of space, they are all here and all beautifully to behold, war has never been so pretty.

The single player experience so far is fantastic and a must for any gamer, I recommend ‘Veteran’ difficulty for the experienced player as I personally find this instalment much easier than COD4. We will bring a Multi player and Spec ops breakdown as soon as we have play tested more but I can say that both are of great enjoyment. So far COD MW2 is one of the first games in a long time that deserves the hype, just buy it before all the fatty’s get all the cakes!